Mainly Mania, 26

(obsession doggerel)

Grinder: bruxomania

For reasons that we’ll never know

Duane just loved to grind his teeth.

Perhaps it eased his human woe?

Or offered him some weird relief?

But—sad to say—it wasn’t long

Before he realized his flub,

Before he knew that he’d been wrong:

He’d ground each one down to its nub.

So now it’s Jell-O for his meals—

Or yogurt if he’s in the mood.

He rarely talks of how he feels

While slurping but not chewing food.