Thursday, April 30, 2015

Head Lines, 13

Wayne’s World

Wayne was a little thick upstairs—
And some called him an oaf.
His brain? A mass of sticky dough,
A never-rising loaf. 

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Head Lines, 12

Delores’ Decision

The time arrived—the SAT—
And so, just for the nonce,
Delores figured for the tests
She’d exercise her bonce.[1]

[1] Brit slang for head or skull. 1860-65. 

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Head Lines, 11

Jeff’s Rocky Meal

A starving Jeff devoured the rock—
It was uranium—
And had a permanent effect
Inside his cranium.

Monday, April 27, 2015

Head Lines, 10

George’s iVow

Sick of iPhones and the rest, George
Vowed he would live cell-free.
Friends and neighbors realized that
Bats were in his belfry. 

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Head Lines, 9


Perhaps I should apologize?
I know I got here late.
But I have limitations, man,
Inside my rocky pate. 

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Head Lines, 8

Sam’s Problem

The women all agreed that Sam
Was just a little dull.
There wasn't too much substance there
Inside sad Sammy’s skull.

Friday, April 24, 2015

Head Lines, 7

Rhonda’s Regret

When Rhonda climbed the palm tree, she
Began to preen and strut—
Which wasn’t wise because she fell
And cracked her coconut. 

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Head Lines, 6

Bart’s Descent

Bart decided he would glide on
His brand-new toboggan.
Everest? A foolish choice: He
Fractured his poor noggin. 

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Head Lines, 5

Melvin’s Miscue

Melvin did a thoughtless thing: It
Made of him a felon.
Grabbed a nightstick from a cop and
Conked him on the melon. 

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Head Lines, 4

Marcus’ Mind

The mind of Marcus, you may know,
Enjoyed an ample home:
He had a massive head, you see—
A most capacious dome. 

Monday, April 20, 2015

Head Lines, 3

Jeff’s Hungry Dogs Find a Meal

The starving dogs just turned on Jeff—
From terrier to poodle.
They got him down and then commenced
To dine upon his noodle.

Sunday, April 19, 2015

Head Lines, 2

Bo’s Beaming Patrons

Bo (the grocer)—very proud
Of produce, fresh and green.
The customers all praised him thus:
“You really use your bean!”

Saturday, April 18, 2015

Head Lines, 1

A new (short) series about words we use for head.

Hoopster Wilbur

The game was close; the clocked ticked down.
Then Wilbur stole the ball!
He dribbled to the basket with
No obstacles at all.

He laid it in so perfectly—
It nested in the net.
The clock expired; the crowd went wild—
No better does it get!

It was the only basket that
Young Wilbur ever made.
Oh, such a splendid memory …
But then he grew dismayed.

The other team was cheering—see,
It was for them he’d scored.
Oh, Wilbur used the ball, all right—
But failed to use his gourd.

Friday, April 17, 2015

Fundamentals, 25

After Words

It’s such a curiosity—
A source of wonderment—
That English has so many terms
For simple fundament.

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Fundamentals, 24

The Falls of Jerome

Jerome was overconfident
About this skiing stuff.
So strange because he spent much time
Upon his ample duff. 

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Fundamentals, 23

Samantha’s Preference

Bert has domestic virtues—how
He cleans and cooks and bakes!
But what Samantha really loves
Are Bert’s hot whoopie-cakes!

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Fundamentals, 22

Jaguar Jane

I thought that, with her Jaguar, Jane
Had horribly offended me
Because she wasn’t looking and …
Then carelessly rear-ended me!

Monday, April 13, 2015

Fundamentals, 21

That Jasper Casper

Casper had a filthy mouth—his
Cursing sure could cook us.
That ghost as well had passion for a
Certain witch’s tuchis. 

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Fundamentals, 20

Donald’s Derrière

Donald was focused and often so much that he
Shunned all his friends. And the animus
Shown by these “friends” shook him hard—from his head to his
Copious gluteus maximus. 

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Fundamentals, 19

Mel's Maladies

Mel had many problems—like he
Had a painful bunion,
Hair that disobeyed, a tic, and
One most bulbous onion. 

Fundamentals, 18

Forgot to post this yesterday ...

Pirate Pete

Devoted was young Pirate Pete
To all he thought his duty.
Among the jobs he most enjoyed
Was classifying booty.

But Captain Kidd was sore annoyed
With Pirate Pete’s faux pas.
“It’s treasure you’re supposed to count—
Not what’s astern!” [Guffaw.]

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Fundamentals, 17

Robby’s Troubles

Young Robby Rummp was troubled—oh,
He was the worrying kind.
He tried to do his very best
But always fell behind. 

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Fundamentals, 16

Roy, Oh Boy!

Roy sold new cars—and used ones, too.
But one night he got drunk.
He stumbled from the tavern, and
He landed on his trunk.

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Fundamentals, 15

Todd Job

Todd’s job there in the cannery
Would challenge any man,
But sturdy Todd was well equipped
With one humongous can. 

Friday, April 3, 2015

Fundamentals, 14

Don’s Deadly Daydreaming

The sidewalk wasn’t shoveled—it
Was really such a farce.
And Don, too deep in reverie,
Fell hard upon his arse. 

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Fundamentals, 13

Teddy Gets Tossed

Teddy didn’t like his job—a
Deli, where he cut lox.
Then the manager just tossed him
Out upon his buttocks.

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Fundamentals, 12

Kurt’s Krisis

Kurt wasn’t happy with his looks—
His face disturbed him some.
He didn't like his abs, his legs—
And he despised his bum.