He spent so many hours in bed
That folks suspected he was dead.
But no! He just had in his head
A love for lying ’twixt the sheets—
For him, among life's greatest treats,
Right near the top with sex and sweets.
But sex was complicated stuff—
And sweets? Well, he had had enough.
So he would lie there, in the buff,
Until at last he could decide
If he preferred his back or side.
But then one gloomy day he died.
His will required that in the grave
His bed must go. And so they gave
Him his desire: He’d had them save
His final bed beneath the ground—
With pillows (fluffed), a blanket ’round
His body—such a cozy mound
To lie beneath while you’re below.
And if you really want to know,
He’s happy that he’s resting so!