ZooWeird 28

A doggerel series about odd or little-known animals.

The giant guitarfish is a species of guitarfish, belonging to the family Rhynchobatidae, which can be found in the Red Sea and the tropical western Indian Ocean. They live in varying depths of 2-50 meters, usually in areas with sandy sea floor. These areas are mainly located near reef flats or coastal reefs; however, the Giant Guitarfish is also known to venture into the brackish waters of estuaries.The Giant Guitarfish is quite large, reaching a maximum length of 3.1 meters (10.1 feet) and a maximum weight of up to 227 kg (500 pounds). They have big black eyes on their pectoral bases with a black cross-like shape between them. Their snout is pointed while their mouth is really small featuring small pavement teeth, which means that the teeth are flattened and arranged side by side like the tiles in a pavement, making them virtually harmless to humans. (All animal info from http://www.strangeanimals.info/2011/10/giant-guitarfish.html#ixzz4TwlUxdOL)

He found it somewhat awkward to

Be shaped like a guitar.

“I am not very musical,”

He mused there in the bar.

But then he heard commotion from

The band behind his back.

It seems their lead guitarist had

An ulcerous attack.

He had to head for home—right then.

So who would play guitar?

The leader wasn’t worried much—

He didn’t look too far.

"Hey, dude!" he cried across the room.

“Come here and help us out.”

Our friend was very worried what

This whole thing was about.

“Just sit right there,” the leader said.

“I think you’ll catch on quick.”

Our friend sat there; the band began;

And suddenly—so sick!—

He felt his body joining in—

The fans were going wild.

And on he rocked throughout the night—

The women were beguiled!

The music was a torrent then—

Like from a broken dam.

He found he was a natural—

Oh, he could really jam!

He had a new career at last—

And things were not the same.

Some Grammys and some platinum—
And then ...The Hall of Fame!