Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Wordbirds, 75


AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd.

vespal adj
of or relating to wasps

His vespal fears were so profound
He chose to dwell far underground—
A cavern he had freshly found.

And there he lived for many years—
And slowly all those vespal fears
Retreated—as did all his peers,

Who thought him just a little weird—
A cavern life for what he feared?
(And then there was that knee-length beard!)

Forgetting why he had moved there,
He took a trip up to the air,
Where wasps were waiting, and I swear

They stung that dude until he died.
I found a moral (cuz I tried):
If you fear wasps, don’t go outside!

Monday, May 30, 2016

Wordbirds, 74


AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.


Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd.


Univocal [yoo-NIH-vuh-kul]
Adj. Unmistakable in meaning
Noun: a word or term having but one meaning

That insult you just hurled at me?
Its meaning is univocal
And hurts in ways you cannot see.

And now my heart is very full
Of plots for ways to pay you back—
And some involve a raging bull,

A bull that I’ve trained to attack—
A bull that’s large and mean and black.
The last thing you will know? A WHACK!

And as you're flying—head and heels
And crying your pathetic squeals
At last you'll know just how it feels!

Sunday, May 29, 2016

Wordbirds, 73



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

titfish noun
trepang [any of various holothurians or sea cucumbers, as Holothuria edulis,used as food in China] 

The titfish had a name that gave
Some jokers chances they could crave:
A name that had, for some of them,
A joke about a her and him.

Of course, some men enjoyed it more
Than women did (you know wherefore).
But men desisted "Sexist play!"
When all the titfish crept away.


Saturday, May 28, 2016

Wordbirds, 72



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

sofkee noun [SAHF-kee]
a thin mush or gruel made of cornmeal (American South)

He knew that he was really free—
Not when he started making bucks,
Not when he shot some mallard ducks—
But when he found the recipe

For sofkee in his grandma’s drawer.
He’d loved the stuff since childhood days,
And he had tried so many ways
To cook it. But, till now, the score

Showed sofkee was beyond his skill—
So he gave up and ate his Kix
Until he learned the sofkee tricks
Among his grandma’s notes. So Bill

(His name) bought cornmeal at the store
And ate it nearly every day
Before he died and went away.
(Then quoth the Raven, “Nevermore!”)


Friday, May 27, 2016

Wordbirds, 71



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

resiliate verb (transitive) [reh-ZILL-ee-ate]
to cancel

She wanted to resiliate
The “yes” she’d said about a date,
But now, she feared, it was too late.

The dude was standing at her door—
Not knowing what a doorbell’s for?—
Oh, going out with him: a chore!

He stood there in a cautious way,
Then turned and simply walked away.
And she was thrilled—a lucky day!

But then he turned right back again—
And rang the bell. She let him in.
She had more fun than … who knows when?

And all of this just merely shows
That love is more than someone knows.
Sometimes it freezes, melts, then flows.

Thursday, May 26, 2016

Wordbirds, 70



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

quebrada noun  [kay-BRAH-duh]
ravine, esp. one that is normally dry or nearly dry but is filled by a torrent during a rain

He camped in the quebrada when
It was convenient—very dry,
But then he heard the rain begin
And saw the danger from the sky.

He grabbed his things and ran so fast,
But ran too carelessly … a slip!
He has no future, just a past—
He’ll not enjoy a camping trip


Again.

Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Wordbirds, 69



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

platycrania noun
the condition of the skull caused by artificial flattening

There was a certain mania
In town for platycrania.

The men in town with rounded heads
Were smooshing them (then growing dreads).

They looked a bit like stumps o’ergrown,
But this involved just hair and bone—

Okay, and quite a bit of skin,
But what a quandry they were in

When women said the look was yuck—
A sort of hatless Donald Duck.

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Wordbirds, 68



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3r

opsimath noun
a person who begins to learn late in life

He'd taken quite a different path—
But he was cool, the opsimath.
He knew that never’s worse than late,
And since he’d never found a mate,
He thought he’d be a college guy—
At least he’d give the thing a try.
So off he went to Harvard, where
He fell in love with English—rare,
I know, but so it is with Love:
It doesn’t matter what you’re thinking of.
And literature brought to his life
Both passion and a loving wife,
Another opsimath who found
Him reading lines by Ezra Pound.

Monday, May 23, 2016

Wordbirds, 67



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

nickstick noun
a stick on which a reckoning is kept by notches

She kept a record of the men
Who’d disappointed her. She’d been
Updating it since who knows when.

She used a nickstick, made a slice
For every man who wasn’t nice—
Who thought that she had had a price.

Well, years went by relentlessly,
And one dark day she showed to me
Her nickstick was a redwood tree,

Now full of notches, roots to top—
She figured it was time to stop.
All men, she thoughta ruined crop!

Sunday, May 22, 2016

Wordbirds, 66



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

meuse noun [rhymes with choose]
a gap or hole (as in a hedge or a wall) through which a wild animal is accustomed to pass

The deadly beast just had to choose—
To go around? Or use the meuse?
Such choices can, at times, confuse.

The deadly beast then chose the way
That he had used just yesterday.
And then? Oh well, what can I say?

The deadly beast just never thought
He’d been observed. The rope was taut;
The deadly beast was trapped and caught.

The deadly beast’s career was through—
He had no deadly acts to do.
But he’s a highlight at the zoo.

Saturday, May 21, 2016

Wordbirds, 65



lippitude noun
soreness or blearedness of the eyes [with viscid discharge] (archaic)

Duane was somewhat worried, for
The lippitude there in his eyes—
Complete with all its viscid gore—
Would give the other dazzled guys

A better shot to win the hand
Of Sarah. So his hopes seemed sunk.
But she rejected that whole band—
And told him: “Duane, I love the gunk

That’s leaking from your eyes. It shows
You really, truly care for me.”
And that’s how Love so often goes:
It’s what we feel as well as see.

Friday, May 20, 2016

Wordbirds, 64



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

liga noun [LIE-juh]
any of several filefishes

He sought a liga—long his dream—
But not for reasons it would seem.
No, not for food or bragging rights—
And not for crazy fish-tank fights.
No, he was going nuts at work:
He lacked a decent filing clerk.


Thursday, May 19, 2016

Wordbirds, 63



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

kinkle noun
a little kink

She had a kinkle in her calf—
She rubbed a little; it got worse—
In fact, it hurt much more, by half.
She had some money in her purse,

So off she went to see the doc,
Who told her what this was about.
“Just lower, please, your longish sock,
And I will rub the kinkle out.”

And so he did—it felt so good!
She sang a very grateful tune.
She caught him in a loving mood—
And they’ll be married—first of June.

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Wordbirds, 62



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

jocko noun
chimpanzee

When Jocko found that he was free—
Escaped the zoo! From tree to tree
He swiftly swung with artistry.

And then heard Tarzan cry aloud:
“It’s Cheetah! Oh, I’ve long avowed
To find him, Jane!” But in a crowd

Of branches Jocko swiftly fled—
He knew that Cheetah long was dead,
Regret and sorrow filled his head.

He found a woman—sight to see!
And said, “So will you marry me?”
“To you? But you’re a chimpanzee?!”

“No, I am Jocko!” Jocko cried.
“I’m not a chimp!” (Of course, he lied.)
And she said no—at least he tried.

And Jocko lived for many years
In forests, where he had no peers—
And lived a life with laughs and tears.

He died surrounded—other chimps.
(Some were so old they swung with limps.)
And that’s our final Jocko glimpse.


Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Wordbirds, 61



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

ingravidate verb
to impregnate (obs.)

Poor Jen was disappointed when
She learned from her computer date
That his intended fun with Jen
Was wishing to ingravidate

(Her).

She changed his tune—and right away:
“Oh, this won’t happen!” she declared.
“It just will not! No, not today!”
And he said, “But I thought you cared!”

(“For me.")

“Oh, I can’t stand concupsience—
I can’t abide such patent lust!”
He thought that Jen just made no sense
And so the whole thing bit the dust


(Their relationship).

Monday, May 16, 2016

Wordbirds, 60



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

higgler noun
an itinerant peddler

The higgler cannot figure what
The farmer wants to buy.
The farmer merely looks and looks—
So circumspect, that guy.

At last, exasperated, the
Poor higgler merely sighs:
“If you ain’t buyin’ nothin’, pal,
It’s time to say buh-byes.”

“Too bad you have to go away,”
The farmer says (named Paul),
“For I had come prepared to buy—
To buy it—buy it all!

The higgler sadly drives away,
His lesson sadly learned.
Just wait—be patient—that is how
A higgler’s living’s earned.

Sunday, May 15, 2016

Wordsbirds, 59



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd

goatsucker noun
any of various medium-sized long-winged crepuscular or nocturnal birds (as the whippoorwills and night-hawks)

Oh, is “goatsucker” just the most noxious of names?
In the world of all naming (such odious games)?

The revenge of such birds should be certain and red.
Oh, taxonomy needs to be turned on its head!

For the birds soar on winds—and what grace they all show
While our names pull them down till like us they are low.


Saturday, May 14, 2016

Wordbirds, 58



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd


fleam noun
a sharp lancet formerly used for much bloodletting

The thought came to him in a dream:
He’d make his living with a fleam!
Oh, he’d see blood flow—in a stream!

And so he posted on the net:
“I’ve got a fleam—your blood I’ll let!”
Oh, soon I will be rich, I bet.

But life did not cooperate.
It seemed he had an unplanned date
With dreaded, midnight-headed Fate.

He felt a fever rushing in—
Oh, would he never, ever win?
He tried some whiskey, tried some gin,

But still felt awful. Grabbed his fleam
And sliced a vein (just like his dream).
Then realized he had to scream!

It hurt so much, that slender slice—
He said, “That doesn’t feel so nice!
A fleam’s not worth it—any price.”

An aspirin cured his fevered brow,
And he works for McDonald’s now—
Is happy with the job, the chow.

At night he sips some old Jim Beam
And eats a sundae (much whipped cream)
And works to find another scheme.


Friday, May 13, 2016

Wordbirds, 57



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd …

epithema noun
a horny escresence on the bill of some birds (as the casque of a hornbill)

His epithema bothered her—
It spoiled the beauty of his bill.
But should she tell him (he was Will)?
She didn’t want to cause a stir.

At last she found the courage, so
She told him that his ugly lump
How thrown her love into the dump.
Will realized that he must go.

So off Will winged into the west—
And found a mate who did adore
His every trait—from crest to core.
His epithema she loved best!

The moral of this avian tale?
Find one who loves you, all the way
And will not vacillate one day.
Such love endures—will never fail.


Thursday, May 12, 2016

Wordbirds, 56



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd …


dimerous adj. [DIM-ur-us]
consisting of or divided into two parts

He drew his sword against the king—
The king just laughed, then loudly swore:
“Oh, you’re forgetting everything!
You will regret this to your core!”

They touched their blades—bright edges flashed—
The Royal court was in a fuss.
And when it ended, hopes were dashed:
The king, all saw, was dimorous. 

Wednesday, May 11, 2016

Wordsbirds, 55



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd …


cofferfish noun
boxfish [so called from its boxlike body]

The cofferfish did not wear socks—
He had no feet, unlike a fox.
He tried to stay away from rocks—
Did not invest in risky stocks.
But he was caught by Goldilocks.
Then ... irony (not paradox):
His bones they buried in a box.


Tuesday, May 10, 2016

Wordbirds, 54



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd …


boutade [boo-TAHD] noun
an outbreak or burst, esp. of temper

He held it … held it … then boutade!
His friends considered this so odd—
He was, he’d said, a man of God.

But this, I guess, I’ve learned this week—
That even when pure peace they seek
Well, even holy ones can freak.

Monday, May 9, 2016

Wordbirds, 53



AT LAST—We’ve now commenced our third—and final—journey through Webster’s 3rd. This time, I’m picking a word near the middle of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.


Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd …

Ananias [or aninais] noun
Liar
[after Ananias, an early Christian, who, according to Acts 5:1-11, was struck dead for lying to the Apostle Peter]

So Ananias—not too pious—dropped
A lie. And Peter, neater, popped
A cap—he took no crap. The lie
Of Ananais (who did die)
Then found a home—the book called Acts.
And so it is with lies and facts.


Sunday, May 8, 2016

Wordbirds, 52


We’ve commenced our journey backward through Webster’s 3rd. I’m picking a word near the end of each entry for each letter—a word that interests me for some reason or a word I’d not ever known before—and surrounding it with a frayed coat of doggerel.

Words that flew into my life from Webster’s 3rd …

azafran noun
saffron

He loved to cook with azafran—
He always did the best he can;
His wife became his biggest fan.

But one day it did not turn out—
And then he sank into a pout
And soon was filled with deepest doubt.

“Oh no,” his wife said (she was Fran).
“Don’t worry ’bout the azafran.
I love you lots, my husband, Dan!”

And Dan was somewhat mollified—
So much, in fact, that he sobbed and cried.
Then cooked some sliced potatoes—fried.