ZooWeird 7

A doggerel series about odd or little-known animals.

Blue-footed booby. A relatively large and rather funny-looking seabird that is easily distinguished by its bright blue webbed feet. As for the name ‘booby’, it comes from the Spanish word bobo which means ‘fool’ or ‘dunce’, a reference to their clumsiness on land

Distribution & Habitat

The blue-footed booby is a strictly marine bird, distributed among the continental coasts of the eastern Pacific Ocean from California to the Galápagos Islands down into Peru. It only uses land to breed and rear young, which it does along the rocky coasts of the eastern Pacific. It forages in cool, offshore waters, and nests on open ground on rocky coasts, cliffs or islands.

The booby was the saddest bird—

It had no clothes or shoes.

It spent so much of every day

Just singing—yes, the blues.

He sang dark tunes so often that

His body felt sad too—

And so it soon commenced a change:

And first? His feet turned blue!

ZooWeird 6

A doggerel series about odd or little-known animals.

Belgian blue (the super cow): The cattle version of Arnold Schwarzenegger! Contrary to what you may think, these bovine bodybuilders aren't the result of intensive steroid use. Similarly to the featherless chicken, this man-made monstrosity is a prime example of the genetic power that selective breeding holds. (from a website)

A cow that’s ripped! What could be next?

A mouse explains a Shakespeare text?

An ibex earns its Ph.D.?

A Nobel Prize won by a tree?

A goldfish wins Olympic gold?

(The greatest story ever told!)

Oh, look at everything that’s flowed

From breaking the genetic code!

ZooWeird 5

A doggerel series about odd or little-known animals.

Atlas moth: The Atlas moth (Attacus atlas) is a large saturniid moth found in the tropical and subtropical forests of Southeast Asia. In the past, the species was thought to be the largest moth in the world in terms of total wing surface area, Recent findings confer this title upon the Hercules Moth.

A waiting room. An Atlas moth.

(He doesn’t take a lot of space.)

He’s there because he has a cough—

It’s not a complicated case.

The doctor checks the Atlas moth

And has some treatments for the thing:

“Just drink this all—this yucky broth—

And, oh, relief! You’ll want to sing!”

The moth flew home. He’d had the broth—

It had a funny kind of taste—

But such a luscious, creamy froth—

So he let nothing go to waste.

But Mr. Moth would not live long—

So very short, his misery.

He sang his final, mortal song.

(The doctor’s name was Orkin—see?)

ZooWeird 4

A doggerel series about odd or little-known animals.

Armored Sea Robin [from Wikipedia]: The armored searobins, or armored gurnards are a family, Peristediidae, of scorpaeniform fishes found in deep waters around the world, with most species in tropical regions. They are related to the searobins in the family Triglidae, and some authorities classify them in that family, but they are encased in heavy scales with prominent spines. They have prominent and often elaborate barbels [slender, whiskerlike tactile organs] on their chins.

He looks a little strange, this fish—

Those little barbels out in front

That make the clueless fish all wish

They could avoid this deadly hunt.

But “weird,” we know, lies in the eyes

Of those who walk and fly and swim.

And it is really no surprise

That I look purely weird to him!

ZooWeird 3

A doggerel series about odd or little-known animals.

Hoosier cavefish (Amblyopsis hoosieri): The Hoosier cavefish is a subterranean blind fish from southern Indiana, U.S., first discovered in  2013. Scientists found that the species was divided into two distinct evolutionary lineages: one north of the Ohio River, in Indiana, and one south of the river, in Kentucky.

The Hoosier cavefish—always blind—

Must have a well adapted mind—

You know, the very sort of kind

That you and I and all possess.

And that’s the reason, in a mess,

That you and I (shall we confess?)

Do not make errors of the sort

That might elicit some retort

(The unkind kind)—or cause a court

To call us to a sad account

Because the staggering amount

We owed would rival that tall mount—

Yes, Everest, yes, that’s the peak.

So, Hoover cavefish, as we speak,

You’re in the dark—it’s hide-n-seek!

And with the darkness all around,

The best news is (I could expound)

Is that it’s hard there to be found!

ZooWeird 2

Amazonian centipede:  a large carnivorous centipede that is widely accredited as being the world's largest centipede, reaching a maximum length of about 14 inches

That centipede is way too long—

A foot—and even more!

And even worse: it dines on flesh

You can’t buy at the store.

It lives there in the Amazon—

And this is just the bomb:

It is impossible to buy

On Amazon.com!

For if you could, you’d wake some night—

In some dark sorry place—

And find your little crawly pet

Had eaten up your face.

ZooWeird 1

A doggerel series about odd or little-known animals.

Angora Rabbit: any of several breeds of long-haired rabbits raised for their abundant fine wool—esp. any of a breed having usually white wool and red eyes

Their eyes are red; their wool is fine.

And (like most sheep) they can’t decline

The role that they are forced to play:

Providing wool (they can’t say “Nay!”).

The name angora—rabbit, cat—

Is from a Turkish town—and that

We now call Ankara, a place

Where I’ve not ever been—disgrace!

But I confess I thought that wool

Was just from sheep—a load of bull.

So rabbits were a huge surprise—

A rabbit sweater? Here’s my size …

So rabbits give us food to eat—

And as most everybody knows:

In races they are hard to beat*—

And now, it seems, they give us clothes!

*Except for that tortoise thing ...