Junior Words, 59

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #12: (g) penurious, (h) impious

Penurious—that’s what I was.

And all of it was just because

I was a teacher.

I know this may sound impious—

But maybe I’d have more success

Like as a preacher?

Junior Words, 58

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #12: (e) stolid, (f) descry

His stolid presence seemed to say,

“I’m so reliable.”

But I was able to descry

That he was full of bull.

He was a fraud, from toe to head—

And back again to toe.

So I devoted all my skill

To letting people know.

Junior Words, 57

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #12: (c) toady, (d) quixotic

The toady was a mighty bore—

He bored me right down to the core.

I set then a quixotic task:
Dispose of Toady—do not ask

About my methods, harsh and cruel—

Suffice to say: I used some fuel.

Junior Words, 56

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #12: (a) disdain, (b) cryptic

I can’t believe you still disdain

So many things we celebrate—

A Christmas tree, a candy cane,

The presents that can captivate.

But you remain so cryptic we

Are not sure of the central source

Of all your animosity—

Unless you’re old E. Scrooge, of course!

Junior Words, 55

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #11: (i) sanguine, (j) wheedle

You can’t be sanguine in your life

If you do what you do—

You wheedle and you gripe and whine

Until your face is blue.

So read a clever book—or see

A film that makes you laugh

So hard that in your front-row seat

You give birth to a calf!

Junior Words, 54

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #11: (g) non sequitur, (h) jaded

Yes, that is a non sequitur—

So obvious to him and her.

Perhaps I’m jaded—maybe not—

But lately my most common thought

Is that all logic’s disappeared—

And that’s a worry—must be feared.

Junior Words, 53

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #11: (e) protocol, (f) diffident

I know you don’t like protocol—

It doesn’t please you much at all.

But you need not be diffident—

Just speak up—tell us what you meant.

And there’s no need to raise your hand—

You’re not in Kindergarten Land!

Junior Words, 52

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #11: (c) indolent, (d) dreadnought

You can’t be indolent and serve

Upon a dreadought, so

Just get your act together, and

You’ll be sailor, Yo!

Contrariwise, you could just keep

On doing what you do,

But then you’ll surely walk the plank—

Then sharks will dine on you!

Junior Words, 51

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #11: (a) simper, (b) pinion

Don’t simper, fool! It will not play—

I deal with fools most every day.

And, yes, I’ve pinioned you—big deal!

And, yes, I know that it must feel

As if you’re being punished. Well

That’s what it’s all about in Hell!

Junior Words, 50

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #10: (i) hauteur, (j) strident

I have to say that your hauteur

Is not a quality

That will endear you to those folks

Who work with you—like me.

You can be strident—arrogant—

You can be so perverse.

It’s hard to picture anyone

Who really could be worse.

And so—just mellow out, my friend.

(I use “friend” loosely here.)

You have a lot of talents, so

Don’t be so cavalier.

Junior Words, 49

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #10: (g) fractious, (h) supercilious

The fractious students ruled the class—

And every sort of kid was there,

From supercilious to ass—

From jungle cat to grizzly bear—

From dangerous to potty mouth—

From insecure to much abused—

From east to west, from north to south—

From brilliant to so much confused.

And there I was—a rookie, scared—

Now facing what I’d feared at night.

And so I stood there, blankly stared,

Then changed careers because of fright.

Junior Words, 48

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #10: (e) arrant, (f) egregious

Perhaps you’re not an arrant fool—

Perhaps you’re really kinda cool—

Perhaps you’re an egregious dork—

Perhaps your prom date was a stork—

Perhaps—no, really—you’re my friend—

And all your problems you’ll transcend—

And I’ll be better—due to you—

I hope you feel the same way, too.

Junior Words, 47

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #10: (c) purloin, (d) procrustean

Because you’re so procrustean—

And will not change your ways—

I have decided, as of now,

To purloin (yes, it pays!)

The little things that lie around

In your apartment, Sam.

So if you’re thinking, “He’s the thief!”

Well, yes, dear Sam, I am.

Junior Words, 46

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #10: (a) nonce, (b) vociferate

Just for the nonce I think that I

Will just vociferate.

For that, it seems, is what’s replaced

Both logic and debate.

Debate is simply shouting now—

And logic? Oh, it died

And now is buried with all fact …

Democracy’s now fried?

Junior Words, 45

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #9: (i) pertinacity, (j) acumen

Your sullen pertinacity

Surprises folks—surprises me.

For I believe acumen ought

To reign instead—so I’ve been taught.

Junior Words, 44

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #9: (g) turgid, (h) apothegm

I’ve read a lot of turgid prose—

So much of it (a reader knows).

Tired apothegm to drear cliché—

That sticky stuff should go away!

So, writers, keep it fresh—oh, please!

I’m begging on my creaky knees.

Junior Words, 43

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #9: (e) gibbet, (f) tincture

They let him to the gibbet, where

He’d soon be swinging in the air.

A tincture in his face of green—

A look the crowd had often seen

On men who did their hanging thing—

Where in the air, they’d swing, swing, swing!

But then—reprieve!—so many cheers. 
And off they went for pizza, beers.

Junior Words, 42

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #9: (c) evince, (d) tractable

If you were just more tractable,

I think you would evince

A bit of human modesty—

But if I can’t convince

You to display some kindness and,

Perhaps, humility,
I’ll just buy you a ticket for
A ship that sails the sea—

A voyage that (oh, I’ll make sure)
Will never, never end.
So my advice to you today:
Be modest, my old friend!

Junior Words, 41

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #9: (a) panegyric, (b) pecuniary

The panegyric he composed

Was for pecuniary gain.

Or so, at least, we all supposed

When he went out and bought a plane.

And with that plane he flew around,

Dropped money to the folks below,

Who battled all along the ground

For bucks, they hoped, would always flow.

Junior Words, 40

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #8: (i) prepossessing, (j) vagary

You have a prepossessing face—

While mine, of course, is a disgrace.

Vagaries of this life and time

Produced both you and me. And I’m

Not satisfied that all is fair—

But many people just don’t care.

They figure if they’ve surged ahead,

It’s all because of talent. Bred

As they were (silver spoons and all),

They make “less fortunate” seem small.

Junior Words, 39

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #8: (g) Gordian knot, (h) disinterested

And I felt that it was such a Gordian knot.

Though I knew I should be a disinterested judge,

I could feel all the facts give a bit of a nudge.

Still, I tried to do right—which is what I’d been taught.

So I settled the case with some head and some heart—

Though the plaintiffs were angry and threatened me so.

But I stuck to my ruling—stayed careful to go

On my errands in town with a cop—I was smart!

Junior Words, 38

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #8: (e) blithe, (f) quotidian

My quotidian tasks are both awful and fun,

But I still do them all—to the very last one.

You can not be so blithe about tasks you must do—

For each failure, of course, is a failure for you.

Still, it would be so nice if you woke up and yawned

And did all of your tasks with the wave of a wand!

Junior Words, 37

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #8: (c) obtrude, (d) veracity

Of course, I know veracity

Is principal with you and me—

And though I don’t wish to obtrude:

When did you take to lying, dude?

Junior Words, 36

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #8: (a) menial, (b) incipient

There were times when I felt that my menial job

Was so awful I thought that I just ought to rob

A bank.

An incipient crisis now formed in my life.

I discussed it, of course, with my criminal wife:

Hopes sank.

For she told me that day that she’d long been a cop—

And my criminal hopes now just had, well, to stop—

It stank.

So I grieved and I groused and I sat in my car—

Or I drove down the road to my favorite bar—

And drank.

Junior Words, 35

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #7: (i) somnambulist, (j) punctilio

The sad somnambulist woke up

And found himself in bright Times Square.

He held a peanut butter cup,

Then took a bite (he didn’t share).

Ignoring this punctilio—

This sharing things with other folk—

Would later cause him heavy woe,

For no one thought it was a joke.

And so they ostracized the dude—

They didn’t give him help that day.

And so he learned not to be rude—

Not if he wished to find his way

Home.

Junior Words, 34

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #7: (g) saturnine, (h) splenetic

There’s no point feeling saturnine—

I’m sure that things will work out fine.

Sure, you were so splenetic then—

That day when you commenced to sin

By poisoning your neighbors’ tree

Because its limbs (as all could see)

Were dropping gunk into your yard.

But jail, you’ll find, is not that hard!

Junior Words, 33

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #7: (e) portent, (f) atelier

So one day in my atelier

I saw a portent in the air.

Outside it was a sunny day,

But then it was I saw a pair

Of ravens by the window glass.

And I was startled to the core.

Before I felt a moment pass,

Those ravens, both, quoth, “Nevermore!”

Junior Words, 32

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #7: (c) necromancy, (d) fie

Don’t toy with necromancy, for

You’ll soon be screaming, “Fie!”

Perhaps you’ll want to join the ghosts—

And hurry up to die.

And that would be a loss for us—

Well, most of us, at least.

Still, there are always those who are

Just thrilled if we’re deceased.

Junior Words, 31

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #7: (a) hoary, (b) probity

Stan lowered his poor hoary head—

And felt himself fill up with dread.

All the corruption he could see—

A challenge to his probity.

But Stan resolved to do what’s right—

The human side of this long fight.

So he reported all the crooks

Who’d cooked the firm’s financial books.

And his reward? No need to guess.

Not one of them would dare confess—

Instead, they passed the blame to Stan,

Who then became a broken man.

Junior Words, 30

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #6: (i) denizen, (j) choleric

If you’re a denizen of Rome—

You live somewhere that rhymes with home.

If you live, oh, in Timbuktu,

Then you must have, well, quite a view.

And if you live in Portland, Son—

Don’t people ask you, “Hey, which one?”

And if you live Paris, France,

You prob’ly know ’bout art and dance.

Now, don’t get choleric, my friend—

Unpleasant poems reach their end.

Junior Words, 29

A High School Teacher’s Final List

List #6: (g) harrow, (h) effluence

That book will always harrow me—

Its effluence of fear.

So when I see that book, well, I

Just don’t go very near.

What is the book? Well, here’s the truth—

And truth will always sing!—

It is just any of the books

That came from Stephen King!