Namely, 136

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

136: zany: outrageously funny, ridiculous (from Zanni, a traditional clown who wears a mask with a long, downward curving beak in the Italian Commedia dell’arte; first known use, 1588)

The dude, I know, was zany, Yo,

But wasn’t all that brainy, so

I guess I told him where to go.

But as I said … oh, not too quick.

And so he bought a pogo stick

And bounced along till he was sick.

I guess I kind of pitied him—

A pogo stick! Just on a whim!

And so I hanged him from a limb.

A friend of mine just sang and sang

To all the cops. Arrest! And, bang!

In just one hour I will hang.

This is the antepenultimate doggerel in this series!

Namely, 135

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

135: wisteria: a decorative vine with hanging grape-like clusters of lavender flowers (from Caspar Wistar, 1761–1818, a Philadelphia physician and teacher—so named by botanist Thomas Nuttall in honor of Wistar; earliest known use, 1842)

She bought some bright wisteria

To help the cafeteria,

Which—truth to tell—was somewhat grim.

Oh, time to brighten what is dim!

But people thought the flowers were

Some menu items. Some infer

That if it’s there, it’s there to eat.

And so? Wisteria defeat.

And customers—each Jill and Jack—
Who swore that they would not come back!

ONLY THREE MORE TO GO IN THIS SERIES!

Namely, 134

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

134: Wedgwood: a British pottery design (from Josiah Wedgwood, 1730–1795, potter who originated the initial design; earliest known use, ca. 1775)

They bought some Wedgwood china, Yo—

Their marriage needed something new,

So china would just have to do

Because they both were kind of … slow.

They thought that things would be so nice—

Would help them salvage what was gone—

Would help complete life’s marathon.

They hadn’t learned: Things don’t suffice.

JUST FOUR MORE IN THIS SERIES!

Namely, 133

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

133: volcano: an opening in the earth through which molten lava issues—or a mountain formed of lava (from Vulcan—Latin: Volcanus—the god of fire and metalworking; earliest known use 1665)

When the volcano went ka-BOOM,

I ran into another room—

As if that would have helped—at all.

Pompeii! The lava fell—a pall

Of bitter ash then floated down—

And coated all the homes, the town.

And so I sit here now—just ash.

It all was over—in a flash.

Namely, 132

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

132: vestal: pure, chaste (from Vesta, the Roman goddess of the hearth, home, and family; first known use, 15^th century)

You act so vestal—is it true?

Or is that just a way for you

To seem as if you’re superior?

(And make us feel inferior!)

But judging from your Facebook posts,

You seem to have a lot of ghosts—

And bad ones!—floating in your past.

I guess the “vestal” act won’t last!

Namely, 131

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

131: trilby: a felt hat with two creases in the front of the crown (from Trilby, an 1894 novel by George du Maurier, 1834–96, because the character wore such a hat in the London production based on the novel; first known use, 1897)

He thought his trilby would reveal

That he was really very cool.

Instead, it showed he was a fool.*

It doesn’t matter how you feel

About some clothing, politics—

What matters is just making sense

(And not just proving you are dense)—

Sometimes it’s best your bag of tricks

Remains so closed things can’t escape.

So sometimes when some things get out,

We learn what you are all about—

We hear you talk—then we all gape

With pure alarm …

*Actually, I kind of like the look of it--but, you know, rhyming?

Namely, 130

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

130: thespian: related to actors or acting (from Thespis, 6^th century BCE Greek actor—perhaps the first to play a character; first known use, 1827)

She was a thespian, and so

She fooled her friends—yes, every one.

She thought that people were so slow—

And so she planned a little fun.

She told them that a Martian craft

Had landed near her house last night.

They wanted cheese; she gave them Kraft—

And off they whirled in homeward flight.

Her friends believed her—made her Queen.

She reigned for many, many years.

The Martians that she said she’d seen?

They laughed till they were soaked with tears.

Namely, 129

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

129: tawdry: gaudy, tasteless (from “tawdry lace,” a corruption of “Saint Audren’s lace,” which could be purchased only at St. Audrey’s Fair in Ely, England; the fair was named after Saint Audrey (Saint Etheldreda), queen of Northumbria, who died in 679; first known use, 1655)

Her tawdry actions stunned her friends,

Who never thought someone like her

Would ever have to make amends

For dalliances with her chauffeur.

She’d always seemed the moral sort—

Who never smoked—did not get high.

So maybe it was just for sport

That she enjoyed that chauffeur guy?

Namely, 128

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

128: Tasmania: an island off the southeastern coast of Australia, famous for its Tasmanian devil (from Abel Janszoon Tasman, 1603–59, Dutch navigator, who first explored the island, naming it in Van Dieman’s Land in 1642; renamed in his honor in 1853; earliest known use, 1853)

He sailed off to Tasmania—

In some weird mystery craft.

His friends—all sailors—told him “No!

You’re acting really daft!”

But off he went—and disappeared

O’er the horizon’s crest.

I guess he really thought that he

Knew life at sea the best.

They found his boat in ’92–

A decade later on.

They found a note attached, as well.

It said: “I think I’m gone.

“I didn’t know what I had done—

I didn’t know the sea—

And so my fatal ignorance

Has meant the end for me.”

And so it did … until this doggerel!

Namely, 127

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

127: Tartuffe: a hypocrite who feigns religious piety (from Tartuffe, the protagonist in a play of the same name by Moliére, 1622–1673; first known use, 1686)

He sat there—arrogant, aloof—

A very latter day Tartuffe.

A pious sort—intolerant.

And not a very pleasant gent.

But then the news spread over town:

Oh, he’d been caught! His pants were down!

We celebrated, days on end—

No more will that dude condescend!

Namely, 126

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

126: Sisyphean: endlessly laborious and futile (from Sisyphus, a Corinthian king who offended Zeus and was punished by having to push a stone to the top of a hill in Hades; however, as the stone approached the top, it rolled back down, and Sisyphus had to start all over; earliest known use, 1635)

And once again, it seems, you ask

Of me a Sisyphean task.

So once again I’ll don my mask

And be the superhero, Yo—

And go fight crime (as you well know)

As I have done since long ago.

But if I do not soon come back—

A victim of some dire attack?—

I do not want to hear a crack

About how weak and frail I am—

For I’ll go off! With POW! and BAM!

And BOOM! and OOF! and even WHAM!

Namely, 125

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

125: stentorian: loud, booming (from Stentor, a herald of the Greek forces during the Trojan War whose voice, according to Homer, was as powerful and fifty voices of other men; earliest known use, 1605)

He seemed to me Victorian—

So male and so stentorian.

He man-splained everything to her—

She took it (with a silent “grrrrr!”).

But one day she had had enough—

She just walked out—took all her stuff

And much of his. And so he screamed

How he lost all that he’d dreamed

Of having since he was a child.

Oh, her departure drove him wild!

So, dudes, just quiet down a bit—

And listen. You can learn from it!

Namely, 124

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

124: spoonerism: a speech error in which the first letters of two adjacent or close words are switched—as “I hiss your mystery class” (from Rev. William Archibald Spooner, 1844–1930, Anglican clergyman and educator, dean and warden of New College, Oxford; first known use, 1892)

He is a spoonerism man—

Though unintentional, of course.

I guess he does the best he can—

But still I laugh till I am hoarse.

One day, I guess, he’ll tire of me—

And when I laugh, he’ll start a race—

And off we’ll go (so brilliantly)—

He’ll catch me; then he’ll funch my pace.

Namely, 123

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

123: sirenic: melodious, tempting, or alluring (from the mythical Sirens, depicted in The Odyssey, whose seductive singing causes sailors to wreck their vessels; first known use, late 17^th century)

I’ve loved her sweet sirenic voice—

And once I heard it? Had no choice.

I steered my ship right for the rocks—

And later on, I heard, the hawks

Were picking at my ruined bones

Right there among those many stones.

So in the Underworld my sighs

Are for those vile sirenic lies.

Namely, 122

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

122: sequoia: the giant redwood tree (from Sequoya, 1770–1843, Cherokee scholar who developed a writing system for the Cherokee language; first known use, 1866)

He climbed that huge sequoia tree—

A feat that really dazzled me.

And then (in case you have not heard)

He thought he’d try to be a bird.

He spread his arms, and then he “flew”—

Straight to the ground (as humans do).

And there he learned from gravity

Some things about reality.

But “learned”—of course that couldn’t be.

He was as dead as Bobby Vee.*

*1943-2016; popular singer in the early 60s; link to his home page

Namely, 121

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

121: saturnine: gloomy, sullen (from presumed result of being born under the influence of the planet Saturn; first known use, 15^th century)

He woke up feeling somewhat down—

You’d call it “saturnine.”

It puzzled him: The night before

He’d felt just peachy. Fine.

It must have been that awful dream—

The kind that most folks hate—

The dreams when you remember stuff—

The worst you animate.

You dream—and guilt flows over all.

You toss—you turn—you weep.

And wish that you could just forget—

And disappear in sleep.

Namely, 120

NAMELY

eponyms (EP-uh-nimz)

words based on or derived from a person's name.

First Known Use: mid-19^th century

“What’s in a Name?”

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, 2.2­

120: salmonella: a pathogenic bacteria causing food poisoning, typhoid, and other infectious diseases in humans and domestic animals (from Daniel Elmer Salmon, 1850–1914, an American veterinary surgeon who took credit for the discovery of salmonella, which was actually discovered by his colleague Theobald Smith; first known use, 1913)

“Yo, I’ve got salmonella now!”

The waiter looked so shocked.

“I’ll tell you what,” the waiter tried—

“So you will not be mocked,

I will not tell the chef out back

What you are ranting here.

We’ll take a couple dollars off

Your bill—so have no fear.”

“It’s not the bill that worries me—

It’s salmonella, dude!”

“Oh, settle down. The salmon’s good—

So please do not be rude!”